Grady Tripp: She's a transvestite.
Terry Crabtree: You're stoned.
Grady Tripp: She's still a transvestite.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Antonia "Tony" Sloviak: That's a nice greenhouse.
Grady Tripp: It's Mrs. Gaskell's. Her hobby.
Terry Crabtree: I thought you were Mrs. Gaskell's hobby, Tripp.
Grady Tripp: Piss off, Crabs. I lost a wife today.
Terry Crabtree: Oh, I'm sure you'll find another. You always do.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sara Gaskell: So. I guess we just divorce our spouses, marry each other, and have this baby, right? Simple.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
James Leer: It's just... for good luck. Some people carry rabbits' feet...
Grady Tripp: ...You carry firearms.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
James Leer: You're not like my other teachers, Professor Tripp.
Grady Tripp: You're not like my other students, James.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
James Leer: Professor Tripp? Can I ask you a question?
Grady Tripp: Yeah, James.
James Leer: What are we going to do with... it?
Grady Tripp: I don't know. I'm still trying to figure out how to tell the Chancellor I murdered her husband's dog.
James Leer: You?
Grady Tripp: Trust me, James, when the family pet's been assassinated, the owner doesn't want to hear one of her students was the trigger man.
James Leer: Does she want to hear it was one of her professors?
Grady Tripp: ...I've got tenure.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
James Leer: Now, that is a big trunk. It holds a tuba, a suitcase, a dead dog, and a garment bag almost perfectly.
Grady Tripp: That's just what they used to say in the ads.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
[Crabtree and a student drag James, hopped up on codeine, out of the auditorium]
James Leer: The doors made so much noise!
Grady Tripp: Is he all right?
James Leer: It was so embarrassing! He had to be carried out.
Terry Crabtree: He's fine. He's narrating.
James Leer: They were going to the restroom. But would they make it in time?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Vernon Hardapple: You drivin' this car?
Grady Tripp: Excuse me?
Vernon Hardapple: This 1966 maroon Ford Galaxie 500. You drivin' this car?
Grady Tripp: It's mine.
Vernon Hardapple: Bullshit! It's mine, motherfucka!
Grady Tripp: You must be mistaken.
Vernon Hardapple: Bullshit!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Terry Crabtree: Let me get this straight. Jerry Nathan owes you money, so as collateral he gives you his car.
Grady Tripp: Only I'm beginning to think that the car wasn't exactly Jerry's to give.
Terry Crabtree: Ah, so who's car was it?
Grady Tripp: My guess? Vernon Hardapple.
Terry Crabtree: The hood jumper?
Grady Tripp: He said a few things that lead me to believe that the car was his.
Terry Crabtree: Such as?
Grady Tripp: "That's my car, motherfucka."

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
James Leer: Who's tuba is that, anyway?
Grady Tripp: Miss Sloviak's.
James Leer: Can I ask you something about her?
Grady Tripp: Yes, she is.
James Leer: So is your friend Crabtree, is he... is he gay?
Grady Tripp: Most of the time he is, James. Some of the time he isn't.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
James Leer: You want a bite?
Grady Tripp: No thanks.
James Leer: That's why you're having them. Your spells.
Grady Tripp: Spells? Jesus, James, you make it sound like we're in a Tennessee Williams play. I don't get spells.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Grady Tripp: I'm a teacher, not a Holiday Inn.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Grady Tripp: Where's the cake?
Terry Crabtree: Right behind you.
Grady Tripp: That's not what I meant.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
[Sara smells Antonia's perfume on Grady's clothes]
Sara Gaskell: Is that Cristalle?
Grady Tripp: Mm.
Sara Gaskell: My God, I wear the same scent as a transvestite.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Grady Tripp: Shit, James. You shot Dr. Gaskell's dog.
James Leer: I had to! Didn't I?
Grady Tripp: Couldn't you have just pulled him off me?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
[Grady offers James some codiene pills]
James Leer: No thanks. I'm fine without them.
Grady Tripp: Right. That's why you were standing in the Chancellor's back yard twirling that little cap gun of yours tonight. You're fine, all right, you're fit as a fucking fiddle.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Grady Tripp: What do we have here? This looks like... that's our old friend Mr. Codeine. That should take the old pinch out of the ankle. Want one?
James Leer: No, thanks. I'm fine without them.
Grady Tripp: Right. That's why you were standing in the chancellor's backyard spinning that "cap gun" of yours. You're fine. Yeah, you're just as fit as a fuckin' fiddle.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Grady Tripp: James like it or not those people out there are your parents.
James Leer: They're not my parents.
Grady Tripp: What?
James Leer: They're my grandparents... my parents are dead.
Grady Tripp: James the man is obviously your father... you look just like him.
James Leer: There's a reason for that.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Vernon Hardapple: Why did you keep writing this book if you didn't even know what it was about?
Grady Tripp: I couldn't stop.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Grady Tripp: I hope you don't find this forward Amanda, but I wonder if I might ask: Did you ever go to Catholic school?
Amanda Leer: Excuse me?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
James Leer: You're mad at me, aren't you? You're mad because I shot your girlfriend's dog.
Grady Tripp: It wasn't her dog, it was her husband's...
[looking at James]
Grady Tripp: Who said anything about a girlfriend?
James Leer: [smiling back]
Grady Tripp: Okay, James, I wish you hadn't shot my girlfriends dog. Even though Poe and I were not exactly what you'd call simpatico that's no reason he should've taken two in the chest.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Walter Gaskell: Are you drinking, Professor Tripp, right now?
Grady Tripp: [smoking weed] No.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Oola: I know you. Double Dickel on the rocks. I never forget a drink.
Grady Tripp: And I never forget an Oola.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Grady Tripp: [Narrating] She was a junkie for the printed word. Lucky for me, I manufactured her drug of choice.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
[eating a box of white-powder donuts]
James Leer: These are incredible. Incredible!
Grady Tripp: Finish the rest of that joint, James, you can start chewing on the box.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Grady Tripp: [Narrating] So there it was. Somewhere in the night, a Manhattan book editor was prowling the streets of Pittsburgh; best-selling author at his side, dead dog in his trunk.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
James Leer: No offence, Professor Tripp, but you look kinda crappy.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Terry Crabtree: [Looking at James Leer's book] The Love Parade... I've got a feeling about this, Tripp. I feel this kid in my bones.
Grady Tripp: ONLY in your bones?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hannah Green: Grady, you know how in class you're always telling us that writers make choices?
Grady Tripp: Yeah.
Hannah Green: And even though you're book is really beautiful, I mean, amazingly beautiful, it's... it's at times... it's... very detailed. You know, with the genealogies of everyone's horses, and the dental records, and so on. And... I could be wrong, but it sort of reads in places like you didn't make any choices. At all. And I was just wondering if it might not be different if... if when you wrote you weren't always... under the influence.
Grady Tripp: Well... thank you for the thought, but shocking as it may sound, I am not the first writer to sip a little weed. Furthermore, it might surprise you to know that one book I wrote, as you say, "under the influence," just happened to win a little something called the Pen Award. Which, by the way, I accepted under the influence.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: I... am a writer.
[applause]

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Wordfest party guest: How did you feel about the adaptation?
Wordfest party guest: I thought it was more literary than cinematic...

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Grady Tripp: Besides, I'm not sure if he's, uh...
Terry Crabtree: He is, I'm sure, take my word for it. I see myself in him.
Grady Tripp: Oh, I'm sure you do.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Terry Crabtree: [after he lost Grady's manuscript] Naturally you have copies.
Grady Tripp: I have an alternate version of the first chapter.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
James Leer: What are we doing?
Grady Tripp: I'm gonna get you a nice meal, a couple cups of coffee, then I'm taking you home.
James Leer: Take me now.
Grady Tripp: What?
James Leer: I'm not hungry.
Grady Tripp: James, you gotta eat.
James Leer: I'll get something out of the vending machine.
Grady Tripp: Vending machine? What are you talking about?
James Leer: At the bus station, they have these cheese sandwiches. They're pretty good. It's better if you take me now. That way, Carl won't get my spot.
Grady Tripp: Carl?
James Leer: Never mind.
Grady Tripp: James, go get us a table, will ya? I'm not letting the most talented writer in my class eat some week-old cheese sandwich, okay?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hannah Green: James will know about George Sanders.
James Leer: George Sanders?
Hannah Green: Mr. Crabtree was saying how George Sanders killed himself, only he couldn't remember how.
James Leer: Pills. April 25, 1972, in a Costa Brava hotel room.
Terry Crabtree: How comprehensive of you.
Hannah Green: James is amazing. He knows all the movie suicides. Go ahead, James. Tell him.
James Leer: There are so many.
Hannah Green: Well, just a few. The big ones.
James Leer: Pier Angeli, 1971 or '72, also pills. Donald "Red" Barry, shot himself in 1980. Charles Boyer, 1978, pills again. Charles Butterworth, 1946, I think. In a car. Supposedly, it was an accident, but, you know, he was distraught. Dorothy Dandridge, pills, 1965. Albert Dekker, 1968. He hung himself. He wrote his suicide note in lipstick on his stomach. William Inge, carbon monoxide, 1973. Carole Landis, pills again. I forget when. George Reeves, "Superman" on TV, shot himself. Jean Seberg, pills, of course, 1979. Everett Sloane - he was good - pills. Margaret Sullivan, pills. Lupe Velez, a lot of pills. Gig Young, he shot himself and his wife in 1978. There are tons more.
Hannah Green: I haven't heard of half of them.
Terry Crabtree: You did them alphabetically.
James Leer: It's just how my brain works, I guess.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
[Grady and Hannah are putting a stoned James Leer into the back of Hannah's car]
Grady Tripp: All right. Let him crash at my house.
Hannah Green: Where should I put him?
Grady Tripp: In the shape that he's in, you could stand him up in the garage next to the snow shovels and he'd be all right.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sara Gaskell: You didn't happen to call our house last night, did you?
Grady Tripp: I think I might have, yes.
Sara Gaskell: What do you think you might have said?
Grady Tripp: I think I might have said I was in love with you.
[pause]
Grady Tripp: He told you?
Sara Gaskell: He told me.
Grady Tripp: And what did you say?
Sara Gaskell: I said it didn't sound like you.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
[first lines]
Grady Tripp: "The young girl sat perfectly still in the confessional listening to her father's boots scrape like chalk on the ancient steps of the church, then grow faint, then disappear altogether. She could sense the priest beyond the grate...." On that particular Friday afternoon, last February, I was reading a story to my Advanced Writers' Workshop by one James Leer, Junior Lit major and sole inhabitant of his own gloomy gulag.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
[last lines]
Grady Tripp: As for me, I lost everything: my wife, my book, my job, everything that I thought was important. But I finally knew where I wanted to go. And now I have someone to help me get there.

OK I cannot keep this secret any longer. I heard from my Cellist today and the new CD: "Chamber Music Discoveries" is now visible online.

http://www.warnermusic.es/nov_index.asp (27 Nov)

We are the 5th CD from the top of the page and my namecheck is at the end of the 4th and beginning of the 5th line of text in Spanish!

Hopefully, the CD will be available on Amazon (and iTunes) soon.

50-5144255012-2

OK. Wednesday is over, time to make a break.

I have spotted some Aardvarks in the Sudan region... and a few more who tried to donate money to the Labour party under assumed names. More Aardvarks setting fare increases on the railways. Several of the beasts have been discovered defrauding football clubs. The NatWest Three who have just pleaded guilty in America; etcetera, etcetera...

I do hope there won't be so many Aardvarks around tomorrow.

You've survived another day and all been wondrously creative. I on the other hand have been catching up with chores (etc.) {I won't go in to the etc.}...

Tomorrow looks brighter
With a schedule much lighter

I've got a couple of things pencilled in for the late afternoon.

but this evening, I've been watching a DVD of Wonder Boys (2000) dir. Curtis Hansen,

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0185014/

and I've really been enjoying this campus comedy-drama. Douglas plays a writer/professor whose life is considerably more interesting than his creative writing. He seems to get himself into tangles by the minute as the film progresses. Highly diverting anyway if you haven't already seen it.

Mode:

Status:

It occurs to me that it would be a good idea to wear a badge (in real life, yes, that does exist, I think, or maybe it doesn't) with your mode and status on it.

Actually, I've changed my mind. I think it would be a bad idea.

"Yes, but do you have an aardvark?"

"Not every man can pull pink off, CJ."
[witty retort left blank for security purposes.]

[memorable extracts from conversations at the Edgware blog meeting]

Catching a flight to Bilbao on March 17th to stay with my Cellist colleague, David Johnstone (& family). We are planning to play through several hours-worth of my compositions. Some of this is specifically composed for Cello, other pieces were written for different instruments i.e. flute, clarinet etc but may work well on Cello - we will have to play through everything and decide what does and doesn't work.

Can anyone guess what this young lady is meant to be representing as her entry for a fancy dress party competition?

You always wanted to have your name in lights... here is the 07 Edgware bolging venue which will no doubt be completely different from next year's similar.

This video is worth a look if you are interested in GCC (Global Climate Change).

...for those of you who cannot access my page over there!

...so I don't need to rush out just yet to pick up those last minute bits-and-pieces for tomorrow's bash.

A quiet day over here. Chilling to Chopin's Nocturnes played by Arrau.

Brain Type Test - Free Results
Are You Left-Brained or Right-Brained?

Although one side of the brain is generally dominant over the other, we should strive to utilize both halves. A balanced brain makes a balanced person - combining sequential thinking with a holistic approach, or linear thinking with intuition, enables us to fully comprehend issues and solve problems. Left-brainers can dramatically improve their problem solving abilities by learning to "follow their gut," while right-brainers can improve the execution of their creative efforts.

Realizing your dominant half is the first step in becoming balance-brained.

Your percentage score for the left brain is 62%.
Your percentage score for the right brain is 38%.

You are more left-brained than right-brained. Your left brain controls the right side of your body. In addition to being known as left-brained, you are also known as a critical thinker who uses logic and sense to collect information. You are able to retain this information through the use of numbers, words, and symbols. You usually only see parts of the "whole" picture, but this is what guides you step-by-step in a logical manner to your conclusion. Concise words, numerical and written formulas and technological systems are often forms of expression for you. Some occupations usually held by a left-brained person include a lab scientist, banker, judge, lawyer, mathematician, librarian, and skating judge.

Your left brain/right brain percentage was calculated by combining the individual scores of each half's sub-categories. They are as follows:

Left Brain

Linear
Sequential
Symbolic
Logical
Verbal
Reality-based

Right Brain

Holistic
Random
Concrete
Intuitive
Nonverbal
Fantasy-oriented

Each of these 12 categories has its own distinctive influence in shaping how you think, learn, and perceive the world around you. A detailed evaluation of your brain type has been prepared and is waiting for you. Order the full report now for this information and an insight on why you are who you are!

http://www.testcafe.com/lbrb/lbrb.html

After several name changes, I finally settled on: "So, you want to be a Jedi?" as my Blog title.

If you had to title your blog after a line from the movies, which line would it be?

Incidentally, I have never watched a single minute of the 6 Star Wars films!

As I have been saying since Summer '06, "Bring back Sven!" Yours sincerely, a Manchester City supporter!

Thanking Subville in advance as I know she'll answer this in 3 seconds flat.

Maybe you know too?

Theme and variations. A musical form where a melody is presented first in its normal setting, followed by any number of modified versions of the melody/theme/tune in mini or micro segments of music.

Beethoven composed one of the masterworks in this form for Piano solo. The Diabelli variations (so-called because the composer of the theme was actually a minnow called Diabellli; he was also a music publisher, but that's another story) consist of a theme and 33 variations lasting about an hour. A massive challenge for any Pianist.

Elgar's enormous Enigma variations for orchestra commence with a theme of Elgar's own composition (variations on an original theme). They are considered one of the crowning jewels of this medium for their brilliant imagination and melodic innovation. One of the variations, Nimrod, is a particular favourite of radio station Classic FM.

Some musicologists have found that traces of the original theme can be heard in a late work of Haydn's.

Elgar also challenged future listeners with a mystery that he took to the grave, to unearth "a larger theme running throughout the work".

This larger theme might be something non-musical i.e. the philosophical statement, that yes, life is worth living!

A positive day. Spent most of it preparing a parcel for a music publisher. I still have to get something bound tomorrow before sending it off first class - not looking forward to the post office queue, but on this occasion, it has to be braved.

Off to shoot some cards shortly. You'll no doubt be able to read of my exploits at the table on blog #3 within the next few days.

2 days of solid rain. I hope it will clear up tomorrow as I need to walk around town a bit.

Try to achieve something and you will soon discover just how weird things in fact are.

Your conclusion will probably be that you shouldn't have bothered getting out of bed in the first place.

Then again, I'm writing this at Midnight 30.

I hope you are all enjoying the drought.

And so, good night.

Click to enlarge.

There may be trouble ahead...
But while there's moonlight and music,
And love and romance;
Let's face the music and dance!

I won't go into details. Let's just say that on a scale of 0 to 100 of stress, it was above 90 and probably above 95.

Today I have intentionally attempted to cut my stress levels to an absolute minimum (as two days in a row like this would have been borderline dangerous).

All of this waiting around for emails that go unreplied (as mentioned on my blog #7 earlier this evening) does not really help matters.

My own policy with email response is to deal with all (serious) correspondence ASAP and if there's anything I cannot answer on the spot, I send a brief acknowledgment of email receipt together with a target date/time for a full response.

It is a shame that virtually nobody I know seems to follow this example.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/dorset/7092301.stm

Cat's daily routine baffles owner

Sgt Podge is collected between 0800 and 0815 GMT every day

Podge's daily ride
A cat is baffling his owner by wandering off at night before expecting to be collected by car every morning at exactly the same time and place.
Sgt Podge, a Norwegian Forest Cat, disappears from his owner's home in Talbot Woods, Bournemouth, every night.

The next morning, the 12-year-old cat can always be found in exactly the same place, on a pavement about one and a half miles (2.4km) away.

His owner, Liz Bullard, takes her son to school before collecting Sgt Podge.

She said the routine began earlier this year, when Sgt Podge disappeared one day.

Ms Bullard rang the RSPCA and began telephoning her neighbours to see if anyone had seen him.

An elderly woman who lived about one and a half miles away called back to say she had found a cat matching Sgt Podge's description.

Ms Bullard collected him but within days he vanished again. She rang the elderly woman to find Sgt Podge was back outside her home.

Owner Liz Bullard thinks Sgt Podge crosses a golf course every night

She said a routine has now become established, where each morning she takes her son to school before driving to collect Sgt Podge from the pavement between 0800 and 0815 GMT.

It is thought Sgt Podge walks across Meyrick Park Golf Course every night to reach his destination.

Ms Bullard said: "If it's raining he may be in the bush but he comes running if I clap my hands."

All she has to do is open the car passenger door from the inside for Sgt Podge to jump in.

Wandering the streets

Ms Bullard also makes the trip at weekends and during school holidays - when her son is having a lie in.

She does not know why, after 12 years, Sgt Podge has begun the routine but explained that another woman who lived nearby used to feed him sardines, and that he may be on the look-out for more treats.

"As long as you know where they are you don't mind as a cat owner," Ms Bullard said.

"I know where to collect him - as long as he's not wandering the streets."

Back at home, Sgt Podge has breakfast before going to sleep by a warm radiator.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/dorset/7092301.stm

For the proper version of this meme go to Subville's page:

http://tinyurl.com/yu7wd6

Meme

What age did you just turn?

Where would you like to travel to?

What is your favourite place?

What is your favourite object?

Favourite food?

Favourite animal?

Favourite colour?

The town in which you were born?

The town in which you live?

The name of a past pet?

The name of a past love?

Your nickname?

Your first name?

Your middle name?

Your last name?

A bad habit of yours?

Your first job?

Your grandmother's name?

The main subject you studied?

20. What do you think about the person you stole/got the meme off?

The posting below is a real transcription of a telephone call I took on November 8th.

I have many tricks up my sleeve for these pests (sorry, Sheryl!) ...one of these 'tricks' is my audio file of Daleks saying:

Stay Where You Are!!! Exterminate, exterminate, exterminate... (in stereo).

cc: Can I speak to the manager please?
z: The manager of what?
cc: The manager of Jonathan Land.
z: And what is Jonathan Land?
cc: Can I speak to the manager of Jonathan Land please?
z: What is this in connection with?
cc: Are you the manager?
z: What is the name of the company you are representing?
cc: I cannot tell you that unless you are the manager.
z: And I cannot tell you that unless you tell me the name of your company!
cc: I think this must be a wrong number; sorry to have troubled you.