Aardvark Blog

It was a real shock to regain consciousness in the first week of February. I was actually in quite a happy place while I was 'dead' and felt that I'd achieved quite enough for one lifetime.

I've woken up to some unbelievably chaotic news. The world economy for a start seems to have been completely crippled. We take the financial system for granted and it's only disasters like the current one that wake us up to the fragility of the system.

On a personal level I am still taking things very steadily and not setting unrealistic goals (yet)!

of buying a new PC from PC World. Possibly this one:

http://www.pcworld.co.uk/martprd/store/pcw_page.jsp?BV_SessionID=@@@@1106714262.1235503667@@@@&BV_EngineID=ccehadegidfdmfmcflgceggdhhmdgmi.0&sku=423915&page=Product

So I thought I'd make sure I could access my gmail account directly through gmail as opposed to Outlook Express.

I used the forgotten password facility only to lock up the gmail for 24 hours as they'd sent a copy of the new details to an obsolete yahoo.co.uk address rather than directly to my Outlook Express.

23 hours to go!

Just starting to snap out of things today. I've got a few problems going on. I had funds tied up with Iceland and they are really dragging their feet in paying up.

The PC is still misbehaving and I need to replace it. I also need to speak to the Sibelius Music helpline although I think they will only partly be able to sort things out for me.

I've got some 1-2-1 teaching lined up this week which should give me a bit of focus. I have been listening to Radio 3 for the last hour or so. Volume very quiet. Gershwin I got Rhythm variations currently being broadcast.

Debussy and decluttering.

My PC was used by 2 or 3 other friends/family members while I was away and has developed a number of antagonising problems. Pages sometimes take 1 minute+ to load instead of a couple of seconds.

I am half thinking of switching to an Apple system although this might seem crazily unworkable.

The Sibelius Music programme I use has gone nuts and the helpline is open tomorrow.

Has anyone switched from PC to Apple or should I just get a brand new PC? No option seems to be without financial and other headaches. Having a machine that doesn't work though is not an option.

This was the text for the opening track which really shot the inspiration levels up for Mike. Our background in the Classical world really hit a nerve here and the instrumental backing is just spine-chilling.

All Over the World – including Latin Text with Translations

Terra pax hominibus – Peace on Earth towards Men

Libera me – Make me Free

Dies Irae – Day of Wrath

http://www.sibeliusmusic.com/cgi-bin/show_score.pl?scoreid=125352

but the link will only work if you get the free Scorch download from here:

http://www.sibelius.com/download/index.html

scroll down and 'get Scorch'.

I received the demo CD with 8 tracks from Mike Turtle in Switzerland yesterday and have just found time to spin it today.

What he's done with my tracks is absolutely awesome and we've surely got a hit CD on the way.

I was meant to go to Switzerland in April to complete the project, I will probably put this back to October in view of my 2-month blip.

I've written Piano and Voice and Lyrics, Mike has done drums, bass and additionals - there's no voice on yet, these are just backing instrumentals.

OK. Well one thing I've realised that's pretty obvious to me over the last 14 days or so is that I don't fit the 24-hour sleep pattern.

I actually got 2 1/2 hours of incredible sleep about 11 a.m. to 13.30 yesterday. Best quality sleep that I was aware of for the last 2 weeks (approx. when I snapped out of things).

I probably need around 6-8 hours per 48 hours taken in 2 hour bursts but only when I'm naturally shattered. It can't be forced to happen at 01.00 every night.

My day job is teaching Piano (+ theory and other technical stuff) I get 20GBP for 1/2 hr of this and there is quite a demand for it in my area.

A friend has kept a few hours of my teaching practise liquid for the last 6 weeks or so and there are a string of new enquiries to follow up.

I am meant to get final approval to go home on Monday morning. I have no doubt that this will be sanctioned and I can at that point try out my new sleep experiment.

The last thing I can remember is my trip to Spain in April 08 and I've forgotten how to use Sibelius Software, the music programme I've been working with for five years.

On one level I am not worried about this at all, as I like to have a fresh approach when composing new material.

On the other hand, having to relearn a lot of things from scratch is going to be a steep learning curve.

I am going to try to write a few more of my 17 genre-benders for flute solo today. The first of these (the only one to be completed so far) has already been YouTube premiered by a young Chinese flautist.

Archer = £2000
Monkey = £500
Carpet = £30
Macaroni = £25 (r/sl)

http://www.philbrodieband.com/jokes_rhyming-slang.htm

These are some of the more fun terms available. It might be amusing to use these live some time.

http://www.americangreetings.com/ecards/view.pd?i=478343366&m=5594&rr=y&source=ag994

I just picked this up and thought it was pretty good.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Electroconvulsive_therapy

12 bouts of ECT (I just discovered today) were required to bring me back to some level of consciousness.

This controversial treatment is portrayed in the film

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Beautiful_Mind_(film)

I haven't entirely wasted the last two months as there is an at least a 50/50 chance of some love interest in the near immediacy.

Nearly had about 5 pedestrian related crashes today and I'm sure it's not just the people/traffic in my little area of the world that this must happen all day long.

It's a major achievement to make it to the age of 50 without being driven into.

I support

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/PSV_Eindhoven

Why?

I am left-eye dominant around 70-30.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Risperidone

I am on only 2mg of this stuff currently. Feeling generally better, but I'm concerned I've picked up something really nasty as a side-effect. Hopefully I am just being a hypochondriac about this.

Looking forward to getting back to my Piano and completing a set of 17 flute solo pieces.

I'd had 2 performances of my flute work on YouTube by a young Chinese flautist. Also had a broadcast of c.40 mins on Latvian Radio.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bt65AjyWueA

Things are progressing and I am feeling a lot better today. Just at the keyboard for an hour today. Hopefully I will be around and back to old tricks inside another 4 weeks.

I had a chiropodist apt. today as apparently I had been walking around barefoot for the first 4 weeks I was 'inside'.

If anyone wants to send me a postcard to

J.FeBland, Avon Ward, Edgware Hospital, HA8, Middx. UK. It will be gratefully received!

I've been banged up in a local hospital for the last 3 mths or so. I suffer from bi-polar or manic depression (more about this another day). I've been through quite a few weird experiences and am more than a little concerned that I might have picked up an infection of the worst possible sort. Hopefully I am completely wrong about this.

I'm still only allowed out for a few hours at a time, but things shd return to normal inside 6 weeks.